When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
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just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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