Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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