He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
