i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
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