Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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