I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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