I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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