plz talk dirty to me
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize