let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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