fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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