I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
