And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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