new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
it glows. i had to have it.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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