No, drunk sperm still make babies.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
