i barfeds in our rink
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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