you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
