So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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