More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
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