Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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