if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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