The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize