Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize