the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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