I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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