We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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