i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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