I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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