would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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