i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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