Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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