he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
