She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
