it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
