Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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