oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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