I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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