just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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