Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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