i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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