an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize