I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
