I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
