before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Can I color on your dick again?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
