Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
