Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
