the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
