Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.