I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
