why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
