Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
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